New Year...New Outlook

Megan A. — Tue, 12 Jan 2010 20:04:27 EST

Good Evening Whomever Finds Themselves Bored Enough to Read This :)

Today I decided this year will officially and drastically different from the last. I've always felt driven to do more...like I was fully capable of making a difference but never knew which direction to in-so I went nowhere. I had ideas but always put off contacting anyone who could help me to "tomorrow". I let my job, single parenting, and school become an excuse. Then I finished my undergrad program, had a marketing degree in hand and one less excuse (school) on my lips. When I looked for volunteer opportunities I was told by family, "remember you have a kid to take care of". I was encouraged to not worry about anything outside of the mundane, repetitive existance they found a comforting for themselves. But I know that's not me. I don't want to live for the sake of existing. I don't want to work soley to keep my bills paid. I don't want to succeed for the sake of putting a smile on my own face. I don't want to focus so much on what I have to do today, that I forget all of the things I want to do that keep getting pushed off to tomorrow, then tomorrow's tomorrow.

Today, I decided I'm done taking tomorrow for granted. I may not be blessed with that "tomorrow" that I lazily profess I'll get things done in. Why wait? Procrasctination is the biggest and hardest barrier to overcome between myself and my future and it's frustrating to know that I put it there in my own way. I'm not sure how I can get out of the lazy mindset I've dragged around other than to FULLY submerge myself in activities. I sent out so many inquiries for volunteer opportunities today that United Way's website began stopping me after each submission "are you sure you're only rewuesting information only on things that really interest you?". YES!!!! I feel particularly drawn to programs to raise awareness of cancer and HIV/AIDS and help those suffering from them. It's strange to me because I've never known anyone personally that has struggled with those issues, nor have I had any personal scares. Maybe I'm sensitive to the suffering of people still holding on to faith that a cure will be found in their lifetime. I can't imagine their daily mental/physical struggles and my heart bleeds for them but is in awe of their strenth and endurance. While I felt this crazy impulse to get info on everything I saw in my area related to that, I also applied to anything related to helping those with no insurance as well. I'm throwing so much bait out there in every direction that something HAS to bite. That's all I need...one bite! And thus my stamina will start to regenergate itself from the ugly dormant state if fell into. I want to start preping for going back to school for my MHSA. I think I have found my calling and I don't want to leave it on "call-waiting" until the opportunity to pursue it "hangs up" on me. I feel so inspired to get on track and start making a difference. I can't until I can tell everyone who says I can't do it because I'm a struggling single-parent "I told you so" AND that moment when my 3yr old is older and I can tell him "Joe Joe, anything is possible, I know that personally...the world is waiting for you! Your gifts are not for you, but those around you..."

Megan Allen
Go start you "tomorrow" today!!God is so good!

Megan Allen's Blog

New Year...New Outlook